Back page of my journal

In anyone’s notebook, the back page is the most personal of all the pages. It’s quite unethical to dig into some one’s personal belongings (the last page of journals in this case), but I am blessed with this habit. I wouldn’t want to leave any chance of getting to know the person better, for good or for bad. So sometimes I secretly used to peep into those last few pages in the notebooks of my pals. And of course this was before we all went paperless.

To your surprise, you can get to know a lot about the owner of that notebook. I found a lot of stuff there… Some were scribblers, some organizers, mathematicians, self-obsessed, and some sketchers. Other things I found there were phone numbers, random thoughts, budgeting, famous quotes, and even personal thoughts. These are like key words to the owner’s personality.

If we talk about my journal’s back page, I would say I have been through phases. I started with being an autograph taker (of course the signatures were mine). Tried different styles and ways to sign. I have been a scribbler too. I used to write the darnest stuff ever! Comments on people walking by, how I love being with some one, or how I hate the chemistry class. You could find it all on that page. And yeah how can we forget the tic-tac-toe and F.L.A.M.E.S!!

Even now, I like to write comments about people, funny, weird, sometimes really mean too… in classrooms, at airports, cafeteria, malls, could be just anywhere. I also wrote interesting stuff sometimes, like a quote that I read on billboard while traveling on a bus, or what I felt like when I was on the way to an interview, or when I was just sitting by the window watching the rain pour…

I always prayed that no one reads them, but could never quit the habit.

My favorite was professor cartoons. Hehe! And yeah, I wrote articles too! Yes I confess! I have written articles and blogs while in class that somehow turned out to be the most interesting ones.

And guess what… the blog you just read was written on the back page of my logbook, while sitting in the lab. Ah! Now you know what I am talking about!

Morning blues!

Getting so early to work is a big deal for me

7 in the morning! Ah! It’s an ordeal for me

An everyday challenge, I don’t know how I manage

Every morning I forcefully open my eyes

And drag myself out of the bed

I splash water on the still-so-sleepy eyes

Only to turn them in to burning red

Every day I wonder why that happens

But not finding the answer, I just move on

Breakfast and dressing up!

Putting on the work clothes and make up on

I enjoy dressing up for work

Formals and heels

But I hate to sacrifice

That extra half an hour of morning sleep

For me, it’s nothing less than bliss

Rushing through the cup of morning coffee

I wonder what the day beholds

Planning, planning and some more

I wonder why I have to follow the clock

Why can’t I just go when I want to?

Oh yeah!

Cz if I get to do that, I will never go…

Little things matter

I came across this little speech somewhere... After Sept. 11th, one company invited the remaining members of other companies who had been decimated by the attack on the Twin Towers to share their available office space. At a morning meeting, the head of security told stories of why these people were alive. And all the stories were just:
the 'L I T T L E' things.

Little things that make our days annoying. Like when we spill coffee on our desks, when we are rushing to catch a bus and the boring neighbor stops us to say hi and ask hows everything going, when we drive to work and the guy right ahead of us drives at 20 mph on a 45 mph speed zone, when your boss gives you that extra work right when you are ready to leave...

The security head told the survivors...
As you might know, the head of the company survived that day because his son started kindergarten..
Another fellow was alive because it was his turn to bring donuts.
One woman was late because her alarm clock didn't go off in time.
One was late because of being stuck in an auto accident.
One of them missed his bus.
One spilled food on her clothes and had to take time to change.
One's car wouldn't start.
One went back to answer the telephone.
One had a child that dawdled and didn't get ready as soon as he should have.
One couldn't get a taxi.

Now when I am stuck in traffic, miss an elevator, turn back to answer a ringing telephone, spill things... I think to myself, this is exactly what I am supposed to be doing at this moment. I don't get annoyed by this any more.

Next time your morning seems to be going wrong, the children are slow getting dressed, you can't seem to find the car keys, you hit every traffic light, don't get mad or frustrated; God is at work watching over you!

May we all be blessed with all those annoying little things that make our life and may we remember their possible purpose.

War between languages!

The Republic of India, Federal republic Parliamentary democracy, with a population of 1,132,446,000, and official languages of Hindi and English. Most people in this country speak Hindi; it’s a declared official language along with English.

British brought English with them. They left the country in 1947, but I think they forgot to take their language with them. We owe them for this! Really! After all, India’s large English speaking population is what’s bringing more global business to the country. On a more personal ground, I feel that it’s easier (at least for me) to communicate my thoughts in English than in Hindi. I can say anything deep, meaningful and convoluted in English without making it sound too dramatic or tacky. Several examples exist. Imagine an evening when the guy drops his girlfriend back home after a date. While bidding good bye, he says ‘I love you sweet heart. Have a good night.’ Sounds normal right? Well let’s try this in Hindi now… Translation in simple day-to-day use Hindi would be ‘Jaanu, main tumse bahut pyar karta hu. Asha karta hu ki tumhari raat achchi beete’ Damn!! What a turn off! That was one. Now I don’t even want to go into translations of the curse words.

But I am sure it’s not the case for all. Some might feel more comfortable speaking in Hindi. Girls… How many times have you heard ‘I wanna friendship (read as phrandsip) with you’ or ‘I doesn’t goes there’. Ridiculous! But what I don’t understand is, why do these dudes even use English at all? Proposing a girl for friendship or whatever, is definitely not the best time to practice/improve your English speaking skills. Especially when you are talking to an Indian girl, who surely speaks Hindi (or at least one the regional language). Clearly, they are trying to play ‘cool dudes’.

So here is my point… Why a ‘cool dude’ talks only in English? Is speaking in Hindi that un-cool in a country called Hindustan? Strange!

It is becoming a social norm slowly. Go to any big city, and you will hear the youngsters talking, walking and mocking the language. It sure is cooler, but that still doesn’t make Hindi un-cool. In spite of being the official language, Hindi is not that well accepted by the so-called-sophisticated society. Just a few minutes ago, I was ridiculed for the reason that I studied in a school where the medium of instruction was Hindi. Hell no! All my courses (Mathematics, Science, Reading, and of course English) were taught in English. Only social studies were in Hindi. Which actually made me pretty proficient in the language. I read some famous Hindi literature also. It gave me an insight to a different perceptive. I am sure the Indian youth is missing out on this kind of literary work. But when I moved to a different school after 8th grade it was taught in English. But wait a minute, Hindi or English, how does that matter? Is that a reason to laugh at some one? Did it make a difference in what kind of person I am? Or how I talk? Or how I think? Well I don’t think it did, except it exposed me to a native world which is hidden from a lot of my fellows.

So instead of feeling low about being laughed at, I feel proud of myself. And like myself even more J By this post, all I want to convey to the readers is that don’t let English over shadow our own language, Hindi. You might feel more comfortable speaking in one or the other language, but please don’t disrespect the language, don’t type cast it. Next time when you talk to me, I might not speak a single Hindi word, but always know that I love the language!!

In the bud

Day 1: August 23rd, 08

Finally, I reached Illinois safe, sound and in one piece (though I broke wheels and zippers of my suitcases, yeah 4 of them blah!). Don’t even ask me about packing. I had to pack my entire house in three freaking suitcases and that took me like... forever! Couldn’t even sleep Friday night for the same reason. I had to donate half of the stuff, half of the rest was trashed, and half of the left was distributed or just left in the house. So technically I have only quarter of what I owned. I don’t mind getting rid of clutter, but what sucked was to throw away some of my precious (had memories attached or were gifted, that is) possessions. Poor me!! But somehow, I managed to leave for the airport with my puffy sleep deprived eyes, wet hair and super stuffed suitcases. To my surprise, guess whom I met at the airport? Dang! That’s Dr. Verma and his wife. I love them. I got so excited, though it didn’t show in my behavior cz I was having a hard time keeping myself together. But it was a great start. What better can you ask for than good wishes right before a new start (especially when you know no one in the new place)?

So I paid a good amount of money to get all three bags checked in, and finally boarded the plane. It was the first time I was flying with Northwest. Don’t ask me if it was good or bad, somehow I find all the major players same, more or less. But yes, I reached Illinois and checked in to the hotel. Luckily, I met another intern at the airport. After loading our luggage in our respective rooms, we decided to go out and look for a place to eat at. I was literally starving! I wanted foooooooooood. I controlled my mood swing and tried to put up a smile and we both exited the hotel. And dang!! Right outside is the mall. Haha! So you cross the road and there is the mall. We headed straight to the mall, and got a big box of Chinese food packed (so that it lasts for two meals). My company was nice. I like her name, Marquita! Reminds me of margarita… finally I was hanging out with a girl.

Day 2: August 24th, 08

Felt like I had a jetlag!! Yeah moving from Oklahoma to Illinois, same time zone! It actually was just a messed up sleeping schedule. I was very excited, and was looking forward to the first day of work. Took a long shower, made sure I looked fresh and ready for the orientation day at work. And yes, I did.

Day 3: August 25th, 08

OMG! I was actually at Caterpillar Inc. All dressed up in formal attire. A day long orientation about n number of topics; ranging from safety, company policy, expectations, to sexual harassment. I liked the last topic the most for the reason that the orator was amazing. Honestly, they didn’t have to spend an hour and a half for that subject. But I loved the way the presenter spoke. He had that spark, that energy in his voice and expressions. I would love to be able to talk like him.

All in all it was fun. I loved the day and came home satisfied and liking my organization.

Day 4: August 26th, 08

Wow! It’s surprising how god knows exactly what I don’t like, and put me in the same situation again and again. Yeah right! I got my job description. And guess what!!! I will be working with CAT-Electronics, R&D Tech Center and I am supposed to develop a code for a dozer. It might be a dream job for any electrical engineer. And yes it does sound very impressive and interesting. Interesting, yes it is. But you know what, I don’t enjoy software (at least that’s a very polite way of saying it). And surprisingly, I always end up in a software development team. Phew! The memories of struggling with my research project are very fresh in my mind. Yes, they still haunt me. But of course not any longer. Cz I got one more nightmare to live. Boohoo!!

So of course, I will give it yet another shot. Hope I start disliking it a little less. My team is nice, and they are willing to help all the time. I would hate to disappoint them. so let’s see how far I go with this.

And the story begins…